The Road Back

I have been bread-less and booze-less for almost an entire month.

Strangely, I find myself wishing that the month were longer, so I could stay here in Rehab.   I don’t want to go back out into the real world.  The world of bagels, croissants, seven grain breads and french baguettes.   The world of pilsners and porters and pinot noir.  There is so much temptation out there!

So, I have decided to stay… Sort of.

Oh sure, I will have a beer on March 1st.  I am really looking forward to raising a cool, smooth, creamy pint of Guinness with friends.  I may have a second, and even a third, over the course of the evening.  Who knows?

Surprisingly though, (and this may be one of the craziest things I’ve ever said) I don’t think I want to eat bread anymore.   It is so strange to say, but I feel much better without it.  My energy level is more consistent.  Jeans that I had to squeeze into in January fit well now.  My skin has cleared up.

For the first time in my life I know how it feels to live without bread, and it feels pretty darn good.   I have taken another step on my own personal road to enlightenment.  And though I often travel backwards on that road, I hope to keep moving forward for a while, now that I have awakened to this feeling.

We are all awakening to things daily.  We are in a constant state of rehab.  Rehabilitation is the process of restoring something back to a condition of good health, or good working order.

All of the things that we use to restore ourselves are like mini-stints in rehab.  Running.  Yoga classes.  Listening to music.  Decompressing with TV.  Reading a good book.  Laughing with a friend.  Dancing like a maniac.

But sometimes, along the way, we get tricked into thinking that the habits we’ve picked up are actually our rehab. We start to believe things like  I can’t function properly without a cup of coffee.  I need a cigarette to calm down and feel like myself.  Comfort food makes me happy.  A glass of wine will help me better tackle that task.  I’m more fun after I have a few beers.  Yeah, that last one is a tough one.

This month I traveled backwards on the path, to find out where some of my habits became a form of rehab, and I am trying to examine them, one by one.  I am hoping to shed some of them on my quest to restore myself back to my best health and my best working order.

I may have to stay here for a while…   So, what are we giving up for Lent?


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2 Responses to The Road Back

  1. Pamela Gustafson says:

    I feel much the same. I gave up Mr. Goodbars and diet coke – only I failed at the diet coke part ;-( .
    But….I still love myself. I feel so much better without the candy addiction (at least to that particular one) and I am happy to see the last of those yellow wrappers with the red print! I do love a piece of chocolate daily, but it is good bye to Mr. Goodbar!

  2. Pingback: Summer Soulstice | Skip to My Lou, My Dharma

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